May 22, 2011

Will The Scalini's Eggplant Parmesan Throw My Wife Into Labor? (A follow-along case study)

Come close to your computer screen. I have something very private and graphic to tell you. Ready? OK.

There is a small child in my wife's stomach. And it technically shouldn't be there anymore. It's rather imperative that we get the child out, lest the 'authorities' will take said child out in a more aggressive manner. And nobody wants that.

And here's where we begin. Scalini's in Smyrna, GA has eggplant parmesan that is notorious for making women go into labor. They started a 'Bambino Club' for pregnant women that order the Eggplant. If you eat the eggplant parmesan and go into labor within 48 hours your baby is in the Bambino Club. They get a free shirt, picture on the wall and something else think. Maybe the newborn gets a free meal or something. 300 babies have been born as a result of this eggplant dish. I tried getting a total number of attempts so this process would be a little more scientific, but our server didn't know how many there were. Judging by the size of and number of names in the book they sign people up in, I'd be surprised if it was over 5%.

We went last night and gave the eggplant parmesan induction a shot. That was roughly 12 hours ago and there's been no action yet. I'll continue to update.

On the restaurant and food itself - if you're familiar with the Provino's restaurants around Gwinnett, this is essentially the exact same thing. Similar looking sign out front, similar decor, same looking menu and items, same food. There is a Provino's 5 minutes from our house so had we known it was the same thing, I'm not sure we would have gone. Provino's doesn't have a baby club or famous labor eggplant, so unless I really think the eggplant induces labor by itself, the extra drive was for novelty purposes.

Judging by all the graffiti on the walls, the section of booths we were in was in the cool section of the restaurant. My least favorite kind of graffiti was all over the place. It lacked art value and was mostly someone writing they loved their lover because the person before them wrote that they loved their lover. Many laughs were had as a result of these markings, for example, my wife asking me how long it would take to write 'sucks' after every single person's name. And then the awkwardness that one would feel if they brought a date there after they previously professed their love for a different person on the same booth.

 My wife obviously got the eggplant parmesan. I got Veal Diana, a veal and eggplant dish. Both were good. Like Provino's, the meal comes with unlimited garlic rolls and salad. The first set of rolls we got felt old and tasted way too salty. Second batch was much better.

Here's the aftermath of my veal diana:

Scalini's Italian on Urbanspoon

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