July 15, 2010

I make ugly salads

I don't do well at salad bars, not in a visually appealing way at least. My home salads are much artsier. I guess this could be art too, but some of that raw unpolished art that only really rich pretentious people 'get'. Perhaps I'll open a salad joint in New York with a number or a one syllable word for the name and make ugly salads. People will be like OMFG these are so genius and they are delicious. They will be genius because I will charge $25/salad or $35 if you want the salad sampler platter. They will be delicious because I will have a regular old salad bar a la Sweet Tomato, Lettuce Souprise you, etc in the back. We will put a massive amount of cheese and dressing on everything. Some people will hate. But let em do it. Others will appreciate the rich cheesey ranch soup garnished with bits of baby spinach and cucumber floaters.

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